What A Funeral Service Revealed About Mormonism and the Gospel

Corinne's sister, Kathy, was a devout Mormon. We knew she was Mormon, and she knew we were reformed Protestants. Since we never interacted much as family due to distance and brokenness within her family, we never had deep conversations regarding the Mormon aspect of her beliefs. Death, and the remembrance of her life revealed the extent of those beliefs and in Kathy's situation also revealed the conflicts between Mormonism and the Catholicism in which she was raised.

It was a blessing for us and for her surviving family members to attend the Mormon memorial service on Thursday night and the Veterans memorial service and burial on Friday afternoon. In the other times we had with family, the conversations were restorative, supportive and encouraging. We stayed with Marcy and Johnny, her husband, and Karen stayed there too. 

There were many tears shared and also personal testimonies from all the sisters and brothers who attended, and Joanne, who didn't attend, sent a note to Corinne, asking her to share it at both services. Dan traveled to Houston in hopes of seeing Kathy before she died but didn't get there in time and was gone by the time we arrived. The sharing of memories and the tears seemed to me to be redemptive in the lives of Kathy's siblings. It helped Corinne to reconnect with James and Wayne especially because we didn't see them when we went down to visit Kathy in July 2023. Also touching to us was the deep gratitude expressed by Roy's 4 daughters, the youngest of which was 8 when she met Kathy (Kathy and Roy were married for 15 years before Roy died).

I observed a stark contrast between the message provided by the Mormon church on Thursday night and Friday, the heartfelt needs of the grieving family members, and the gospel message that our hope is based on. As Corine and I sorted things out we understood a little better how the Mormon church became appealing to Kathy even after her first husband (who got her into the Mormon church) abandoned her with 6 children. The Catholic church (she attended Catholic High School) never gave Kathy all the answers shew demanded about life and life's purpose and why she needed to follow the Catholic church's teachings. Although Christianity is more credible than other religions (humanism and paganism included), even we reformed Christians live with a bit of wonder and uncertainty about aspects of Christianity that are difficult to grasp, but which we choose to hold onto by faith. As Augustine reminds us, "By faith we believe what we cannot see, and through that faith we see what we believe." For Kathy and many others, to be certain about everything that requires faith you need a system, which is what the Mormon church is. Its a works based, earn your way to heaven system, where if you do enough good things and you do the special things that the Mormon church offers (like sealing your marriage in heaven) you don't need to worry. The good news is that because of the outreach made to Kathy's children by the Mormon church, we are assured they will never become Mormons. The prime example of this is her first born son, James who came to Jesus while serving a 10-year prison sentence.

Kathy requested one song out of the Mormon hymnbook to be sung on Thursday night. I am surprised this song even made it into the Mormon hymnbook, but like most cults they mix the good with the bad. In a service where the Mormon leaders didn't bother to include one scripture passage, the words of this hymn below and the testimonials and tears of those who shared, provided the much needed hope of the gospel. So in Friday's memorial service I read  the words below.

I stand all amazed at the love Jesus offers me,

Confused at the grace that so fully he proffers me.
I tremble to know that for me he was crucified,
That for me, a sinner, he suffered, bled and died.

I marvel that he would descend from his throne divine,
To rescue a soul so rebellious as mine.
That he should extend his great love unto such as I,
Sufficient to own, to redeem, and to justify.

I think of his hands pierced and bleeding to pay the debt,
Such mercy, such love, such devotion can I forget?
No, no I will praise and adore at the mercy seat,
Until at the glorified throne I kneel at his feet.

To this I added that as the family gathers to mourn the loss of Kathy, and family come in touch with her recent sufferings and our own brokenness, the words of the gospel of Jesus, as expressed in the words of the hymn she selected, have the power to change all that has been bad, to become not true. This was the theme of the sermon Pastor Tim Keller preached at Redeemer Church, PCA in NYC the Sunday following the horrifying September 11, 2001 terrorist attack at the World Trade Center. The message from Keller, that through the power of the gospel all that has been bad becomes become untrue, takes faith to believe and embrace, but gives far greater life than works-based system of Mormonism.

Following my time of sharing many more family members came forward to share tearful testimonies of gratefulness laced with brokenness, through which the gospel could take greater hold in the lives of us who grieved Kathy's passing.

Donald R. Avery

August 11, 1926 - May 10, 2024

We remembered my dad's life and legacy at his memorial service on May 25, 2024, where I shared the following thoughts concerning his life and the positive impact he's had on me.

One of the readings was Psalm 23, verse 6 of which says "Surely goodness and mercy will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever." My dad lived life believing that promise. He had many struggles but instead of the struggles making him bitter, they made him better because he was able to see them in the light of his personal walk with God and saving faith in Jesus. Through the struggles, he saw and believed God's goodness and mercy to him personally and he lived with the assurance that he would, and now does, dwell in the house of God forever.

Four years ago, he asked me to help him write about his journy from June 1944 when he graduated from High School to when he returned from military service in June 1946. As he explained the story in his book, My Formational Journey, he told of a time while serving in the US Army overseas that he was ridiculed for by some of the men in his unit because he walked with a limp, caused by being mildly afflicted with polio when he was 16 or 17. He went on to explain that he had suffered from such shame about the incident that he contemplated taking his own life. But he prayed to God, came before God needy, and asked God to remove the shame that gripped him. He was instantly freed to live life fully. His remaining time in military service was an adventure!

This incident and his response to God's faithful answer prepared him to deal well with other struggles where he faced disappointment.

• A car crash during his last year of college that shattered one of his legs and broke bones in his face left him in a body cast for 6 months, tended to by his mother, a nurse, in their Buffalo Road home. But during that time, he met our mother through a mutual friend.
• When my brother and I were in high school he was working for a company that was depending on voters to pass a proposed transportation bond that was defeated, causing him to lose his job at a company he had recently joined. But, eight years later after a couple of other jobs, he started his own company at age 60 and worked another 20 years engineering the subdivisions of Chili, Riga and Ogden. My brother and I live in two of those subdivisions.
• Though during his last three years, he was wheelchair bound, but became a beloved resident at the Episcopal Church Home, encouraging the residents and staff there.

For people like my dad, who receive the gospel, it changes everything. It has been said that in Christianity the bad events and circumstances are made no longer true. He was thus able to own Psalm 23:6 for himself.

Two other beautiful characteristics about my dad were:

• He was always more interesed in hearing about you then telling you about himself.
• He never stopped learning. 

These characteristics are on view in this remembrance. When he was 87 years old he had my brother put him on the Amtrak train in Rochester so he could visit me when I was working on  the Hudson River - Tappan Zee bridge replacement in Tarrytown, NY. I picked him up at the train station in Croton-on-Hudson and we went to a few viewing locations where he could see the progress of the bridge construction. He was interested in me and interested in learning what was happening at the bridge. 

My dad was a lifelong blessing to me because he demonstrated how to live life as God intends it to be lived.

  

 

A God Who Redeems - Flower City Work Camp 2024

 

On the final day of work at this site I arrived to find a familiar looking roll of carpet that I had donated several years ago. The carpet had a tortured past. After purchasing for my parent's house, my elderly mother changed her mind and refused to have it installed in her home, so we took it to our home, used a portion of it to replace a worn bedroom carpet, and donated this remnant to Flower City Work Camp which stored it at their Lyell Avenue warehouse for 5 years. It also turned out that the neighbor who purchased my parents house wanted to restore the beautiful wood floors underneath the old carpet. The rejected carpet was redeemed and found its way this woman's home. But the story of the redeemed carpet pales in comparison to the story of the redeemed homeowner who also has had a tortured past. Originally from Haiti, she came to the US with her husband and two children, was abused by her husband, fled the place she was living, came to Rochester to receive help from a woman's shelter before somehow purchasing this home. Even in the purschage of this home, after the sale she had to replace the hot water heater and furnace. She explained to two of us adult leaders that she is learning each day to trust God to provide for her many needs. Her story of brokenness is heartbreaking but the story of her daily walk of faith and hearing of the encouragement and love this team of youth and adults provided over 3 days spent in her attic, kitchen and basement testifies of God's redemptive work in her life, the team members lives, and even a carpet. 

Congaree National Park - Appreciating and Learning From What's Been Lost

 

Congaree River

   

Wilson Lake (former oxbow)

Floodplain Gut

In September 2023, we visited Congaree National Park located just southeast of Columbia, SC.  Only 27,000 acres, it is dwarf-sized compared to most national parks. It is a remnant (11,000 acres) of diverse, old growth forested floodplain that was preserved through the efforts led by Henry Hampton, a local journalist, and incorporated into the national park system in 1976.  It includes loblolly pine, bald cypress, sweetgum, american beech, swamp chestnut oak, american holly, water tupelo, dwarf palmetto and more.  The tallest loblolly pine is 169 feet tall, and some bald cypress are nearly 500 years old.  We took a ranger-led 2.4 mile hike on the boardwalk loop trail that was so informative.  The guide was a retired South Carolina Department of Natural Resources biologist who knew the park well. If we had more time we'd have taken the Cedar Creek kayaking trip that would have provided a different vantage point for viewing the park.

There were once 35,000,000 acres of forested floodplain that existed in the southeast and Gulf of Mexico before white settlers began arriving here in numbers in the 1700's.  Trees were cut for gain - ships, railroads and buildings, and the lands were drained and converted to pastures, farms and cities.  But something was lost too.  Floodplains provided natural storage for floodwaters.  Floodplain guts (pictured above) are shallow swales that regularly conveyed floodwaters and nutrient rich sediments from rivers that were deposited in the forested floodplains.  Oxbow lakes, like Lake Wilson (pictured above), were formerly meandering rivers that migrated downstream and, often during a flood, cut through the neck of the meander, leaving a a semicircular curved lake that provides habitat for waterfowl and fish.

The natural storage that was once provided by forested floodplains has been replaced with engineered, large-scale flood risk mitigation projects involving river channelization, levees, floodwalls and reservoirs all of which.  Today's floodplain managers and water resources engineers can sometimes use the principles evident in nature within Congaree National Park's floodplains to reduce peak flows and sediment delivery to lakes and streams through projects that increase natural floodplain storage through reconnecting anthropogenically modified streams to their floodplains using channel plugs, bank lowering, floodplain plantings, and spreaders to create features similar to what the guts (also called sloughs) do naturally. 

This quote by William Faulkner beautifully describes a gut.

"The thick black, slow unsigned stream almost without current,

which once each year ceased to flow at all and then reversed - 

spreading, drowning the land and subsiding again, leaving it

still richer...."  William Faulkner

So while much of our old growth forested floodplains have been permanently lost, this wonderous preserve illustrates naturally what floodplain managers and water resources engineers can attempt to recreate in some locations today.  I am fortunate to have had the opportunity to appreciate this pristine forested floodplain and to learn by seeing the principles of how rivers and their floodplains work together in an ecologically beneficial manner.  

My Interest and Water Resources Work on New York's Erie Canal

 

With more than 40 years of experience in New York State’s waterways, Water Principal Ken Avery has a resume that spans projects from river hydraulics to ecosystem restoration, flood risk management, dams and levees. Ken believes that we possess the engineering tools and technology to design, construct, manage and operate our water infrastructure in a more resilient manner to yield greater benefits to the public and the environment, while reducing the risks to life and infrastructure.

Here, he discusses the past, present and future of the historic Erie Canal System, and provides an update on how he and the team at Bergmann, an affiliate of Colliers Engineering & Design, are contributing to important efforts to ensure the viability of the system for New York residents and visitors for years to come.

Tell us about your background and what led you to your interest in the Erie Canal.

My interest in the Erie Canal system spans all aspects of it – its history, the economics and the technical details. I grew up in Rochester and lived in New York State my entire life, including going to college there. I’ve always enjoyed the important role of New York State in American history, as my dad has. And I’m fascinated by how the early canal engineers were able to use the materials and the engineering practices they had, which were nothing compared to what we have to work with today, to build the original canal system. They had timber, quarried rock, cement and wrought iron to build the original Erie Canal and the numerous feeder canals. Peter L. Bernstein’s Wedding of the Waters: The Erie Canal and the Making of a Great Nation does a really good job of explaining how they accomplished this feat.

Can you explain the different ways the Erie Canal is used today and how it has evolved?

Today, it’s primarily used as a recreational waterway for pleasure boats and the towpath is now the Erie Canal Heritage Trail.  The Erie Canal Heritage Trail has recently been completed and runs parallel to it for most of its length. But in 1825, the canal system started as a four-foot-deep canal, a ditch essentially. In fact, the first 56 miles of it were built without any locks on a very level, flat area between Rome and Syracuse, NY. Over the years, there were some expansions to the canal in the 1850s. It was deepened into seven feet, and that allowed heavier tonnage to be shipped. In 1918, which seems like it should have been at the end of the canal-building era, the railroads had become very powerful so, the thought was that if we increased the tonnage on the canal and used the materials we have today, you could build the gates of the locks with steel, which is a much stronger material than timber. The availability of steel enabled portions of the Mohawk River to be canalized using moveable dams to create navigation pools between locks located on the river’s edge. That expansion was the first to use large steel structures, and we have one of those structures here in downtown Rochester, New York – the Court Street Dam. The idea was that the Barge Canal system could be a competitor to the railroads. And as late as the 1960s, that canal system was shipping a payload of annually. However, the opening of the St. Lawrence Seaway system in 1959, allowed ocean-going ships to come into the Great Lakes through the St. Lawrence Seaway project, and that really ended most of the commercial shipping on the canal.

What is the current condition of the canal?

If you go along the West River Wall in Rochester, you’ll see that there are sections called monoliths and these are concrete castings that are maybe 40 feet in length.  You’ll see one monolith that looks to be in good condition. And then the one right next to it has an incredible amount of deterioration. If you look at the concrete, you can tell that it’s not broken through the aggregate, but around the aggregate. That’s an indication of poor quality in concrete construction. The concrete practices and quality control were nowhere near as good as they are today. The other aspect of this is that waterway infrastructure is very expensive to rehabilitate.

The canal also includes 130 miles of raised earthen embankments that during the navigation season impound 12 feet of water above the adjacent lands, some of which are residential. Over the years, in many locations, dense tree vegetation has been allowed to grow on the embankments, impairing their inspection and assessment. Bergmann has assisted the Canal Corporation in developing an inspection and maintenance Guide Book and a Generic Environmental Impact Statement to improve the condition and safety of these earthen embankments and reduce the risks to life and damage to nearby infrastructure.  This program will require many years of persistent inspection, evaluation, prioritization and construction to restore the embankments to a safer and more maintainable condition.

Can you tell us about the Reimagine the Canals Initiative and our involvement?

 Reimagine the Canals was announced in 2019. It’s a sweeping initiative to see how the canal system can be reimaged for the 21^st century. There are five objectives:

• Resilience – Utilize Canal infrastructure to mitigate summer flooding and eliminate ice jams in the Mohawk Valley
• Regeneration – Adaptively reuse infrastructure and surplus land to improve the quality of life in communities bordering the waterway
• Restoration – Manage the waterway to restore the natural environment for people and wildlife, rebalancing a highly compromised ecosystem
• Reuse – Use water no longer needed for large ships to support new uses such as agriculture and recreational fishing, and further bolster water- and trail-based recreation and tourism
• Retrofit – Identify opportunities to drive operational improvement that will reduce ongoing operations and maintenance costs and generate revenue

We’re involved in a number of ways, primarily looking at flood mitigation on the Mohawk River. We also provided a lot of hydraulic evaluations and flood damage evaluations, both in terms of the potential flood damage reduction and in flood insurance premium reductions that could be achieved simply by operating the canal system in a way where the movable dam gates would be opened in advance of a flood event, and to release their impounded water. Another aspect that we helped out with is managing water in the 60-mile pool between Rochester and Lockport to support recreational sport fisheries.

What advice do you have for people looking to get into the waterways field?

If you’re interested in any aspect of water, dive in.  Take on part-time or permanent jobs, take courses in the water field, read the history of great water projects, read technical literature and read water policy. While on this journey, take every opportunity to learn more and soon you’ll find what you’re most passionate and gifted for.

Words of Remembrance Given at My Mother's Funeral Service - August 20, 2022

 

Two weeks ago tomorrow, while peering through the window above our kitchen sink that overlooks our firepit patio, I noticed for the first time this summer a hummingbird. The ruby throated hummingbird made his way from one cluster of flowers to the next, gathering nectar to fuel his activities.  I’ve often thought that a sighting of something unusual in nature to be a harbinger of something that lies ahead. Sometimes those sightings have included dark symbols such as black crows circling overhead that turned out later to be false signs.  Hummingbirds, however, are symbols of lightness and joy.  People who adopt the hummingbird as a totem or symbol are thought to be playful, adaptable, and can combat negativity with ease.  They also serve as good reminders to live life to the fullest and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. 

I visited mother that afternoon and shared every photo I had taken during our recent vacation with Tyler, Jennica and their children.  She savored each one and was enamored with them.  She told me how much she loved these little children and how much she enjoyed the times visiting with them and engaging them in conversation.  She said “I like to ask them questions to find out what they’re thinking about.”  That turned out to be the last time I or anyone would see her before she suffered the debilitating stroke that happened less than 24 hours later.  But what a special last memory that was.

Her last engagement with anyone here on earth was:

• not concerned about things bothering her

• not begging for attention

• not filled with worry; but

• Enjoying and giving thanks for members of her family.

As I started winding back the years of her life that I could recall, it revealed one instance after another of mother putting her family and their interests ahead of her own.  Once Bob and I left the nest, she tended to her own aging parents, and her young grandchildren.  Once her parents had passed, she spent more time with her grandchildren, and with Dad visited church members, friends and family and bringing comfort to those who were suffering.  When those contemporaries had passed on, she focused on her great grandchildren, who are gathered with us today. Holidays and birthday gatherings were always special events that she enjoyed and in her younger years performed much of the cooking for.  Even when she was unable to carry the load of entertaining family she always enjoyed each and every one.  We were all particularly blessed in 2021 to have gathered with mother and dad at our home on both the Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays.  All of you here can remember that she treasured even our recent family gatherings.

   

All of these memories beg the questions:

• What made it possible for mother to keep the focus on others?

•       What made it possible for mother to overcome the challenges of depression that she         faced earlier in life?

• What made it possible for her to live a life well-lived?

• Why did I see a hummingbird outside our window and not black crows?

All of the answers to those questions for mother can be summed up in having a vital relationship with God through the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

I don’t know all of her journey to faith - when it began and when it really took root in her but when I shared with her as an excited young teenager that I received Jesus as my savior and Lord, her response was “How can that happen for me?”  It happened, and not long from then, through the influence of godly pastors, church friends and her husband.  

Dad, the work that God had done in your life some 30 year earlier, and the example of your daily faithfulness to God and your family was probably the greatest consistent positive influence in her life.

Those of us who had the opportunity to visit mother in the Strong Hospice Care unit where she was eventually transferred to, were able to see her when she was in a state of peacefulness, although not fully conscious.  That experience was something unexpectedly rich.  She squeezed Dad’s hand while he held it.  She turned her head when Tim walked from one side of the bed to the other.  I believe she felt Bob’s kiss.  I believe she heard our prayers, our singing of hymns and our assurances she was in good hands.  She had recently been suffering more and more from the effects of dementia which had robbed her of some of the peace that she normally exhibited and that was concerning.  So, during those final visits we shared with her it was almost like God was beginning to roll back the human suffering that came with the dementia, even as her life on earth was diminishing and her eternal life beginning.

I ask that as we continue in conversations with each other today and the following days to share your remembrances of mother with one another and encourage each other in our time of grieving, and I leave you with the image of the hummingbird as an image of her life here on earth.  

Understanding The Dobbs Supreme Court Decision

 

This is a day for freedom loving and Christian people to be thankful for the Supreme Court ruling in the Dobbs v. Jackson Women's Health Organization case. There's so much in and behind this very clear ruling:

1. There's no implicit right in the US Constitution or Bill of Rights to end unborn life.
2. Therefore, the individual States get to decide how to address the issue of abortion.
3. There is a peaceful process in place to amend the US Constitution to include a right to abortion if those who support abortion wish to do so.
4. This decision overturns the legally convoluted and flawed Roe v. Wade decision of 1973.  The majority could have upheld Dobbs on a 6-3 vote, adding Chief Justice Roberts to the majority, but decided to go all the way and overturn Roe v. Wade. 
5. Unlike the Supreme Court's Dred Scott decision that helped lead us into The Civil War, this decision, like Brown v. Board of Education, promotes liberty and life to a maligned and underserved class of people.  
6. It matters greatly who you vote for as President of the United States.  Donald Trump, by relying on The Federalist Society to advise him on selecting justices to serve on our federal courts, assured our nation that we would have originalists making important decisions.
7. The culture, with the help of science, has become increasingly pro-life, and this decision, rather than breaking new ground in our culture, affirms a gradual change in our culture that favors liberty and more protections for the unborn. 

To Christians and freedom-loving people of all political affiliations, can we use this opportunity to offer a better story to our friends, co-workers and neighbors?  There are many good articles already posted at www.thegospelcoalition.org and there will be many more on this subject, but the post by Winfree Brisley here www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/remember-overturned-roe/   focuses on giving thanks and allowing a true story to take place in our minds. We have the opportunity each day to tell that better story.